Health

4 Things Boring Couples Would Never Do

If you are a fun couple, you know it. You are comfortable with any and all situations around each other. You’re not afraid of your partner’s weird smells, sandwich toppings, or kinks. In fact, you celebrate them. If you’re a boring couple, though, you probably have no idea. If you wouldn’t do any of these four things, chances are you might be part of an uptight couple.

Wear Matching Underwear to a Threesome

Okay, okay. A boring couple probably isn’t having a threesome in the first place. The fun couple, on the other hand, is having the threesome and wearing couples matching underwear sets to let the third know they mean business. The underwear says that they take their threesomes seriously. They take it so seriously, in fact, that they need matching patriotic undies to express their enthusiasm.

The point is, threesome or not, that fun couples aren’t afraid to get a little silly with one another, even when it comes to sex, because life is too short not to peel matching eggplant emoji underwear off your partner.

Fart in Bed and Other Gross Things

We all know the script early in a relationship. You feel a fart brewing, so you slip off to the bathroom to discreetly let one loose. Boring couples never get over this shyness. If you turn red with embarrassment after an accidental toot, you might be one half of a boring couple.

Someone who’s part of a fun couple knows that farting in bed is an opportunity to pull the covers over their partner’s head and hear them squeal. Accidentally fart during sex? A fun couple is breaking out in giggles.

It’s not just the farting. Fun couples aren’t scared of all the little gross things that come with being a human. If you need a pimple popped or a hair plucked, your partner is right there for you. That’s all a part of getting to know someone.

Name Their Intimate Body Parts

Fun couples know that your favorite body parts deserve names. After all, you are (hopefully) spending quite a lot of time with those parts. It’s only common courtesy. Some people opt for more conventional names, like Sheila, Roxy, or Gregor. Other people go a bit more niche: little teapot, for example. Regardless, a fun couple gets up close and personal with one another and finds ways to bring their quirky personality into all areas of the relationship.

Send a Different Kind of Sext

Sure, sexting is pretty much standard fare for most couples nowadays. What sets the fun couple apart from the boring couple is just how weird those texts can get. If you’re one-half a fun couple, you might find yourself snapping pictures in the produce aisle to send to your partner, letting them know which produce they most resemble. No long strings of romantic poetry for your partner! They’re getting celery sticks and portabella mushrooms, instead.

Being a part of a fun couple is really about being so comfortable with another person that you never have to feel embarrassed. You can let all your guards down. When you’re able to do that, everything is an opportunity for fun, even staying in for the night in your couples matching underwear sets.

If you wouldn’t do any of these things that fun couples do, it might be time to loosen up a little in the relationship and, perhaps, in the bedroom, too. Don’t be afraid to be a little weird, silly, or adventurous. Maybe you’re not up for having any threesomes, but you could certainly throw on a pair of matching underwear.

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