Guess who’s pregnant? Not me la, but Bridget Jones – because, as the title reveals, she has a baby in Bridget Jones’ Baby. Although she’s a mother-to-be, her greatest worry isn’t about her child’s well-being – it’s about the paternity of her unborn kid. Not too sure if she’s got her priorities right, but then she is Bridget Jones, after all.

Luckily, that’s all she has to worry about. If Bridget Jones had a kid in Singapore, she’d be a lot more neurotic because there are so many things that Singaporean mothers must worry about when they’re pregnant! Where they sleep, where they go, and what they say could have detrimental consequences if they’re not careful. So here are five pantang things Singaporean mothers must never do when they’re pregnant (even if they’re not pantang). You don’t want to take a chance on your child, do you?

1. Tell anyone about the pregnancy before 3 months is up

Don't think Bridget Jones worried about this Bridget Jones' Baby though. Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

Don’t think Bridget Jones worried about this Bridget Jones’ Baby though. Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

If you’re a mother, only two other people may know about your pregnancy when you first discover it – your husband and your gynaecologist. That’s because it’s pantang to tell anyone about it before the 12-week mark, and just like in the West, it’s also to avoid compounding your misery if anything terrible happens (choy!).

But personally I think it’s because the pregnancy will definitely show after three months.

2. Sleep on a bed that is uneven

Those aren't baby bumps for sure. Credit: Ripoff Report

Those aren’t baby bumps for sure. Credit: Ripoff Report

If you don’t want your child to have cleft toes or strange deformities, make sure your bed is completely flat and smooth! I had a friend’s mother who had twin toes growing from one of her toes, making it extra difficult to wear heels. It all happened when my friend’s grandmother slept on a bed that turned out to have a nail sticking out of the wooden boards. She couldn’t feel it, but her daughter definitely did.

Though for Bridget Jones, who’s sleeping with whom is probably more of an issue than what she’s sleeping on.

3. Touch sharp objects

Even these are sharp. Credit: Isetan

Even these are sharp. Credit: Isetan

Sharpness often denotes severing of ties or harshness if you’re pantang, so expectant mothers must not touch sharp objects while pregnant otherwise this harshness might affect the future baby. Washing knives is allowed, of course, but we guess this tradition is also to make sure that the woman is extra careful when she’s handling such dangerous objects.

Although if you think about it, anything can be sharp… like your nails and teeth. How do you avoid touching those?

4. Attend funerals

Nope, you can't go anywhere near. Credit: Redwire Times

Nope, you can’t go anywhere near. Credit: Redwire Times

Funerals represent death, which is the opposite of being pregnant (which symbolises life). Never shall the twain meet, because you don’t really want to jeopardise your child’s life by exposing them (if you have twins) to unwanted negative vibes. Besides, if it’s the funeral of a loved one, we’re sure that he or she would have wanted the best for the child.

You should still give money though – send a proxy to do it!

5. Swearing

Don't curse too loudly. Actually, don't swear at all. Credit: DeLuca Insight

Don’t curse too loudly. Actually, don’t swear at all. Credit: DeLuca Insight

Just like with the harshness of sharp objects, swearing carries unpleasant and inauspicious connotations. For some strange reason, it’s possible for your curses to rebound back onto you (I suppose that might happen if you try to swear at Harry Potter), meaning that it might hit you and your child. You wouldn’t want your kid to need a Horcrux upon birth, so it’s best to avoid swearing while your child is still in your tummy.

Besides, isn’t it unseemly for a pregnant mother to be cursing?

Bridget Jones' Baby. Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

Bridget Jones’ Baby. Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

For Bridget Jones (Renee Zellweger), though, her problem is finding out whether Mark Darcy (Colin Firth) or Jack Qwant (Patrick Dempsey) fathered her child – or someone else! Let’s hope she’s more careful next time when she’s propagating the human species, and catch Bridget Jones’ Baby to find out the identity of the father!

Don’t tell anyone she’s pregnant though – three months might not be up.

Watch the latest featurette here:

 

Credits: Ripoff Report, Isetan, Redwire Times, DeLuca Insight, Golden Village Cinemas