The Ghostbusters reboot is coming, and with it a whole new slew of ghosts that look like flying agar agar and mochi (Jell-O and marshmallows to the Americans) which have been given cutesy eyes and giant mouths. And the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is back, as seen in a quick cameo on one of the many Ghostbusters TV spots! Who knew food could be so terrifying?

The Staypuft Marshmallow Man returns in Ghostbusters! Credit: Staypuft Twitter

The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man returns in Ghostbusters! Credit: Stay Puft Twitter

Over here in Singapore we only have pontianaks and orang minyaks for the Ghosbusters to fight, and frankly their Proton Packs are’t going to do much good against them since, well, pontianaks are fast and orang minyaks are slippery. What we really need are food ghosts that come to life to haunt our sunny island, something that’s as iconic as the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man – that’ll make us go “awwww” and “oh crap!” at the same time.

So here are some of our favourite dishes that would make fantastic Ghostbusters enemies!

1. The Ghoul-la Melaka

Guka Melaka, ice kachang version with face. Credit: Hungry Ghost

Guka Melaka, ice kachang version with face. Credit: Hungry Ghost

Pictured here is ice kachang with gula melaka, and if you tilt your head to the right, the two big holes look like eyes, with the ridge being a grim mouth that looks like a \: emoticon. Pretty creepy if that whole thing came to life and became a Ghoul-la Melaka! Being made of ice, and being in Singapore, it’ll constantly be melting. It’ll be a horribly sticky mess wherever it goes, and it’ll leave a heck of a stain for the cleaning aunties to handle. Plus, there’ll be ants everywhere!

But it’ll be tasty.

2. Ghost-reng Pisang

Ghost-reng Pisang will banana you to death. Credit: Fried Chillies

Ghost-reng Pisang will banana you to death. Credit: Fried Chillies

This time, if you tilt your head to the left, the two yellow banana portions look like eyes, with the the hole becoming a mouth for a 😮 look. While you might be tempted to take a bite, imagine if the entire crispy fried mess came to life and gnawed on your face! Worse, it’ll leave crumbs everywhere, meaning that you’ll be cleaning up for weeks after the Ghost-reng Pisang attacks.

See, it’s better to just eat raw bananas – healthier, too.

3. Sambal Sting-wraith

A tasty, spicy Sambal Sting-wraith. Credit: dbites

A tasty, spicy Sambal Sting-wraith. Credit: dbites

Focus on the centre of the picture, where the white flesh is – it kind of looks like a jagged mouth, with the blob of sambal on the top left like a cruel eye and the sambal mess on the top right like a disfigured eye, forming a sort of S; face right? Unlike the first two ghosts, the Sambal Sting-wraith can actually kill you with its spiciness, and we all know that stingrays are deadly as living creatures already (remember poor Steve Irwin?). This shadowy, spicy creature would swoop in just as you’re enjoying that sugarcane juice, reminding you that the fiery kick of the Sambal Sting-wraith still lingers…

Maybe you should have ordered sambal squid instead.

4. Chai Tao 鬼

Chai Tao 鬼 - the lingering spirit at all good hawker centres. Credit: Ahballing

Chai Tao 鬼 – the lingering spirit at all good hawker centres. Credit: Ahballing

The Chai Tao 鬼 would be one of those small, impy ghosts. Just look at the delicious fried carrot cake picture above and tell me the three small holes in the centre don’t look like some sort of tiny toyol about to jump into your mouth and possess you. Fried carrot cake is made up of small lumps anyway, so it’ll be natural that they end up as some sort of Slimer-ish creature.

Chai Tao 鬼 would smell better than a pontianak though.

5. Kaya-ko

Kaya-ko - a withered old crone in kaya. Credit: Rasa Malaysia

Kaya-ko – a withered old crone in kaya. Credit: Rasa Malaysia

If you squint, you’ll see a wrinkled, withered old woman moaning in the kaya spread above, the Singapore Kaya-ko. Will she bear a grudge? Will she be angry if you eat green kaya instead of brown kaya? If there were a Singapore movie about Kaya-ko, would it be Ju-Ondeh?

And would you find Toast-shio watching you from behind?

Ghostbusters! Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

Ghostbusters! Credit: Golden Village Cinemas

If you’re hungry for more food ghost action, then the Ghostbusters reboot will be up your alley! Don’t worry about what all those naysayers have said – early reviews have indicated that it’ll be an amazing comedy that’s worth of the Ghostbusters name! Four ladies busting ghosts – what more could you ask for in a comedy film?

Who you gonna call?

Credits: Stay Puft Twitter, Hungry Ghost, Fried Chillies, dbites, Ahballing, Rasa Malaysia, Golden Village Cinemas